by

August 15, 2011

Do you like this?

I think it's pretty unfair, how people are always going on about how bitchy women are.

"Girls being girls," they say. "Or girls being bitches." The Germans call it Stutenbissigkeit. I think it's really unfair. Men are real bitchy to each other half the time, too. They have these arguments, where they argue about music or politics or something, and really it's just Stutenbissigkeit, only they're men. It's really exhausting, actually. And then they beat each other up! Men are always physically attacking each other. Girls hardly ever beat each other up. Apart from on Jerry Springer. And we're the bitchy ones?

I was thinking about this at the Slutwalk yesterday. It's not like there were no boys there – there were lots of boys there, lots of straight boys too – but it was mostly female. And it was so… nice. The atmosphere was so... NICE. The police were so chilled out. Someone gave me a bindi. Everyone was nice to each other. I've never been to such a peaceful demonstration in my life. Are women really that bitchy? I think we're pretty fucking NICE to be honest.

We'd been planning on getting a bit violent actually – me and my Australian friend, Diane.

"We need to get people's attention," she'd said to me, a couple of weeks back. "We need to make these bastards realize how angry we are."

"I've got a good idea," I'd said. "We can get a big picture of Dominique Strauss-Kahn and just, like, burn it. Like how the Arabs burn the American flag. We'll just burn him."

"And we need to smash up Alice. If we see any Alice stores on the way, we'll smash them up."

"Okay," I said. "And we can dress up like chambermaids. Hey, wait a minute. Didn't you change from Deutsche Telekom to Alice only, like, three weeks ago?"

"Well, I had to," she said. "They are the cheapest Anbieter. The cunts."

But in between those best-laid riot GRRRRRRRRRRL-style plans and the Slutwalk demonstration came the London riots, and me and my friend Diane realized what law-abiding citizens we were, deep down.

"Let's not smash anything up, huh, Jacinta?" Diane said to me. "Anyway, the insurance will just pay for it all."

"Okay," I said.

So we walked along together, me, and  my Australian friend Diane, a friend from England, another girlfriend from Australia, one from New Zealand, one from Sweden. The other Australian girl persuaded me to take my top off and walk along in my bra. She wrote the words bitch, slut, cunt, woman over my body.

"It's a bit hard. writing the word 'woman' on your stomach," she said. "The skin's not quite as smooth down here."

"Yeah, I know," I said. "That's my squidgy Caesarean gut."

I felt kind of awkward and self-conscious with my squidgy Caesarean gut hanging out to be honest. I kept on feeling decidedly non-feminist whenever I walked past photographer with big, expensive cameras. I kept on sucking my belly in and imagining myself on the front page of Bild on Sunday morning.

After the demo was over, we walked past a sign that read: "Jede 3. Frau ist  von sexueller Gewalt betroffen worden." My friend from New Zealand, she's just so gloriously non-integrated, I love it. She's been living here for approximately 1 million years, and she still can't speak German. It's like she's trying to physically force Thilo Sarrazin to admit that the Turks aren't that bad.

"What does that mean?" she asked.

"Every third woman's been affected by sexual violence," I said.

"Oh, I belong to that statistic," said the New Zealander.

"Me, too," said the Australian.

"Me, too," said the English girl.

"Me, too," said Diane. I didn't say anything. Diane turned to me.

"You, too," she hissed urgently.

"Oh, yeah?" I said, halfheartedly.

"Yeah, remember what you told me happened to you once?" she said.

"Oh, you mean on the train."

"And that other thing."

"Oh, yeah," I said. "Me too."

"Jacinta," said Diane. "Don't let them push you out of the Betroffen von sexueller Gewalt gang."

"Okay," I said. I put my top back on. The sun was going down and I was starting to get cold.

"Honestly," said Diane. "Sometimes you're just not assertive enough, Jacinta. That's what your problem is."

by

August 15, 2011

Comments (10)

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men are scum...at least in their minds. A lot of them have unhealthyfantasies regarding sex and women. Very few men actually act on these violent impulses. A slut walk isn't going to change any of that one bit and it is really the wrong strategy if you want to change anyone's behaviour at all. This sort of display simply isn't provocative in our society any more. In India, yes, perhaps.

DSK more than 2 years ago

@Em

You only need to read the comments on YouTube of the Berlin Slutwalk (frinstance: Frauen die wie Schlampen behandelt werden wollen, haben es verdient, wie Schlampen behandelt zu werden - gefickt und weggeschmissen) or The Local and you know what kind of world we live in - one that totally, totally accepts rape. And that anyone who says"Oh, actually, it's pointless and silly what those girls are doing" that they're basically pro-rape. I mean, that's basically what they are. They shouldn't bother saying "Why aren't you demonstrating against clitoris circumcision in Africa?" They should say. "Oh, but I'm pro-rape." That's all they should say.

Jacinta more than 2 years ago

Re: Pampered sluts

I was on the slutwalk and found that so many different groups of people were demonstrating and being represented- transexuals, lesbians, straight woman, straight men, gay men. There was a fantastic atmosphere and a real sense of camaraderie. I wouldn't agree that we're living in an all-gender-friendly society or that Northern Europe is some sort of Utopia, especially looking at recent events in the news. Unfortunately there are many causes and groups of people all across the world, as you quite rightly mention, that get overlooked, however I believe the messages and ideals behind the slutwalk were enough to make it a worthy cause.

Em more than 2 years ago

Yeah I'm sorry SS

Not really gloriously unintegriert, only a teeny bit, but we still managed to piss off the Sarrazins anyway.

Jacinta more than 2 years ago

Dunstalike

what's kirsten dunst doing on the slutwalk?

ally more than 2 years ago

factual inaccuracies to service storytelling

actually, the question was only about the meaning of the word 'betroffen' and the so-called friend from New Zealand manages to get by fairly well in German and was carrying a bilingual German-English sign on the demo: Amok Mama is stretching the truth to score comedy points... don't believe everything you read in blogspots

SS more than 2 years ago

Pampered sluts

I'm glad to learn that the slutwalk is all about having fun with friends - at least it makes some kind of sense. Pampered females in an all-gender-friendly society demonstrating... for what exactly??? It would surely take on a different meaning, and more 'balls' (oooops am I being sexist?) to parade as ‘sluts’ in Teheran, or Kabul. Girls, what about taking to the streets for a more meaningful, crucial cause, like child prostitution (speaking of one’s right to NOT be a slut), genital mutilation, war rape (men get raped too!), even lesbian rights… anywhere but in good old northern Europe! Even the condition of baby cows seems like a more vital issue here, and I’m a shameless carnivore!

sasha more than 2 years ago

integrieren ist viel zu schwierig

I was about to ask what was "glorious" about your friend's refusal to integrate, but then I realized that refusal to integrate is basically what exberliner is all about.

Thilo Sarrazin Jr more than 2 years ago

A shame

How wrong you are, Frederick.

Mark more than 2 years ago

The SW

sounds incredibly flipping boring.

Frederick more than 2 years ago

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