If you’re lucky enough to find yourself in the dumpster fire that is Tinder in Berlin, you’ve probably come across some pretty…memorable matches.
The one who’s really into group activities
You’re forever trying to work out if they’re just really close with their friends, or have another seedier agenda to push. What’s up with all the group activities? Why are they always showing up to your date with a couple of friends in tow? You’re all for sex-positivity and agree that it’s important for everyone in a WG to get along, but these are some confusing signals.
The DJ or musician fuckboy
In their Tinder picture, they stand behind the DJ booth casually seducing the crowd with their beats. As a musician, they regularly perform on stage while groupies cheer them on. It’s all very enticing. Until they suddenly call it quits because they just “really need to focus on their music”.
The local hottie
Berlin is densely populated, so it’s quite possible that you’ll match with someone in your kiez, or perhaps even in your building. It certainly makes for a convenient hookup, but make sure to end things well when it all runs its course. The last thing you want is to run into them everytime you take out the bio waste (wearing your house-shoes, of course).
All GIFs no chat
Bless their heart, but this one has no chat game. Their responses range from *cute panda* all the way to *grumpy cat* and sometimes even *laughing baby* when they’re feeling extra fun. This match is likely not even leading to a meetup, since you just can’t seem to get a word out of them. Perhaps they’re just shy, but the format can only say so much.
The one who’s actually looking for a WG
It’s no secret that Berlin is a tricky place to find long-term accommodation and many will tell you that it’s all about who you know. This Tinder match probably just arrived in the city and is likely “still figuring things out”. That’s fair, but keep your eyes open. Before you know it they’ll have a couple of boxes in the cellar, some books on the shelves and hair clogging up your shower drain.
The friendly fresh arrival
Utterly harmless, but it probably won’t lead to a steamy romance. Their profile says something like “New in Berlin, looking for someone to show me the city” …and that’s truly all they mean.Don’t get your hopes up. This match may turn out to be a life-long friend, or maybe just some platonic company for a big night out.