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  • Konrad Werner: Election poster guide


Konrad Werner: Election poster guide

Germany's current thicket of election posters may seem intimidating. Just what are all those photoshopped faces and varyingly bland catchphrases really trying to whisper (or shout) at undecided voters? Konrad Werner explains his favourite posters.

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What’s the purpose of an election campaign poster? If you’re an opposition party, the answer is obvious – get people excited, turn them on, stroke their mental nipples and tease their spiritual genitals. Motivate. Mobilize. Make them feel like there’s a better world, which they can have. All they have to do is choose it. Just alter your sense of reality and everything can be different and you can be happy.

The government, on the other hand, has a different task. It is selling people something they already have. And, like those brain-deadening adverts for CNN on CNN (which actually go on longer than the actual fucking news) the point of the CDU’s election posters is to numb your consciousness and detach you from your soul. Meanwhile, Angela Merkel will gently wipe the sweat from your brow, fix the straps, find the vein, and administer the final release you’ve been yearning for. So you see, the two sides are playing different ball games.

Here’s a handy guide.